Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

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Latest post Wed, Nov 18 2009 11:25 PM by koolaidstains. 41 replies.
  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 6:00 PM

    • apachegirl
    • Top 75 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Mon, Mar 9 2009
    • Albuquerque, NM
    • Posts 87

    Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Okay, so I usually don't do this kind of thing, because I don't want to seem like I'm whining, and I know there are probably many others out there who are much worse off than me. Right now, it doesn't feel like it.

    On September 29th -- a day and a half before the start of the new fiscal year -- my supervisor at the non-profit I worked for came and told me that they lost the EPA funding for my position. Thing is, they knew about it for some time, and didn't bother to tell me until a few days before Oct. 1st. It was only a part-time position, and I knew I needed to get another job, because I wasn't making enough to raise a kiddo on. I took the position intending for it to be only for a while, but I got complacent. I think the universe was sort of pushing me off the cliff, so to speak, when I lost my job, because I just wasn't making ends meet. The other thing is, I was growing to hate it there, because I worked in a "good-ol'-boy" network, with double standards out the wazoo. Plus, I wasn't making even one-half of what I was worth. My whole career has been in upper management/administrative positions making a MINIMUM of well over 2X what they were paying me.

    But now, the money has run out -- and I mean COMPLETELY. I didn't have any savings anyway, because the job paid so little, we were living check to check. I've scattered resumes and cover letters all over this town, and the internet, but I know it will take some time. Mean time, I have a little one to feed, and I'm getting nervous now. I've been making some beaded items, but the economy right now is such that folks really can't afford the extras like beaded keychains and beaded halters and headstalls. Plus, I'd have to make tons to make enough to get me through, and I can't justify taking that much time away from my job-hunting. Right now, my full-time occupation is finding a job. I have my Bachelor's and about 11 years of upper-mgmt experience, but there's just not a whole lot out there. I don't want my little one to worry, and I've told her to let MAMA worry about it, but kids are pretty smart. I try to hide my anxiety in front of her, but it's not always easy, especially with creditors calling all the time.

    I guess I'm just a bit overwhelmed and scared, and I wish something would happen soon. I've put a few of my treasured items up for sale on another website: the you-know-who's list.com, like my authentic Louis Vuitton bag that I bought myself when I got my dream job with the tribe some years ago, and an absolutely STUNNING silver and blue lapiz bracelet made by one of the most world-renowned Native silversmiths EVER (who was a family member -- he passed on so now his stuff should be worth more... but the economy... well, you know the rest). I feel bad having to sell the bracelet, but I could potentially get about $1K for it to someone who is knowledgeable about the artist and his stature and reputation. I need to sell the stuff quickly, and it's just the darned economy right now...

    So, this vent turned out to be more than just a little... sorry. I see from other posts I'm not the only one. I guess it just FEELS that way. Thanks for "listening" y'all!

     

  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 6:47 PM In reply to

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Vent as much as you need to, or even more!! There are plenty of us here who will listen, [or read,] and offrer a shoulder to cry on, if needed/wanted.

    apachegirl:
    I see from other posts I'm not the only one. I guess it just FEELS that way.

    Yes, it always does -- been there, done that MANY times before I "retired".  [Only 'wage slave' in family, with wife and children.]  I know it dsoesn't help to hear that, but it does establish my credentials.

    I expect you will soon be hearing from the others here.  Hang in there!

    Stan B.

    Ignorance is curable; Stupidity has neither cure nor excuse.

  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 7:27 PM In reply to

    • LoisB
    • Top 10 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Fri, May 16 2008
    • Utah
    • Posts 1,912

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

     OH I'm so sorry! This darned economy thing is really causing all sorts of issues isn't it? We're always happy to provide a shoulder to cry on, and an listening ear, cause it really does help. Now, have you gotten yourself signed up at least for food stamps? Being unemployed, you should qualify, and with a little one too, that should make it easier. A friend of mine just had to sign up for the program-- it really does help to at least know you've got a little food to rely on. Beyond that I'm no help. I work from home on comission and mostly am a home-maker, so.... you'll be in my prayers!

    ((HUGS))

    Lois

     

  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 9:23 PM In reply to

    • SEllen
    • Top 50 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Thu, Mar 19 2009
    • southwest Tx
    • Posts 237

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Sad 

    I'm sorry that you're having to sell off your prized possessions, I know that hurts too.

    I wish there were more that I could do than to say Your In My Prayers.

    Louis(?) gave you good advise sign up for every program you can until you get on your feet.

    apachegirl:
    I guess I'm just a bit overwhelmed and scared
       Who wouldn't be!

    We're here when and if you need us.

    sellen

     

     

     

  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 9:32 PM In reply to

    • apachegirl
    • Top 75 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Mon, Mar 9 2009
    • Albuquerque, NM
    • Posts 87

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Thanks, y'all. I have sent emails to nearly my entire address book about my LV handbag for sale. Keep your fingers crossed that I get a hit quickly!! I have one bill in particular that is dangerously overdue. All this nonsense has brought my chronic insomnia back -- with reinforcements...

     

  • Tue, Oct 20 2009 10:11 PM In reply to

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    The Hardest part is "Asking for Help". I can understand that one.

    After a medical Emergency, I discovered there is so much help out there, Un Hu! If you Qualify. ( I didn't, no residency, living in an RV)

    The Angel Food ministries, is based on income. It is amazing program.they are all over the USA.

    www.angelfoodministries.com

    I just kept telling myself, "I'm at the bottom,so I can only go up".

    BD Forum, is a great place to "Vent". We can't solve the worlds problems, but we do care enough to Keep them in our prayers.

     

    Gyspy Mary

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 3:13 AM In reply to

    • Cyn
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on Fri, Sep 12 2008
    • Posts 1

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

     ...and sometimes just knowing someone else understands and cares is just the thing that keeps you going...and smiling at least part of the time!Wink

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 5:56 AM In reply to

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Don't worry about venting! We're here just for that! And the forums are a great place to do so.

    I'll loose my job at the end of this year and I say thanks that this situation hits only me. No family and especially no kids. It's not that I don't want children (I think, kids are a gift, that we all should appreciate!), I'm just thankful that I don't have any to worry about. I'm also far from running out of money or having to sell any of my belongings. That is the situation so far, but you never know what happens without a job. I also have a master degree/diploma and about eight years job experience and even with that it is extremely difficult to find a job. What I'm trying to say with all this is, that there are many people atm, who have problems and that you are not alone. That doesn't ease the situation for you or takes any pressure from you, but at least you know we think of you!

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 6:34 AM In reply to

    • momma9
    • Top 50 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Tue, May 27 2008
    • Dover, TN
    • Posts 141

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

     Hello,

    Please do not hesitate to sign up for assistance!  There are many benefits to being an American, and being able to feed your family is an important one.  I recognize that many families do not qualify for help, but I feel that you would qualify.

    Also, as Gypsy Mary noted, there are AngelFood Ministries.  Here is a quote from the website link:

    Who qualifies?

    Everyone, there are no applications or qualifications to order Angel Food.

     

    You and your child are in the prayers of some awesome people.  You are not alone in your fears.  May you find the help you need and may you have courage and strength.

     

    Peace and love,

    Diane

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 6:35 AM In reply to

    • Cat
    • Top 10 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Fri, May 16 2008
    • SW Ohio
    • Posts 1,891

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

     I know how scary this can be but things will pull through for you. They always do some how some way.

    I was a single mother as well at one time with twins (still feel like it for the most part now even though I'm married, hubby is always gone) and I went through the same struggles you are enduring. I didn't lose my job but I had the financial issues you are having. It's not fun, it's stressful and just makes you want to breakdown and cry a river.

    Have you signed up for welfare yet? Like Lois said you should be able to get food stamps and more than likely cash assistance as well. I know for most that have worked all their life it's difficult to get in that line but it will at least feed you and your daughter and keep a roof over your head. It certainly doesn't pay all the bills but maybe you can pick up some side jobs, or sell some beaded items for the necessary bills- water, electric. Maybe you can teach some classes on beading for some extra cash.

    I will keep you in my prayers that things turn around for you soon!

     

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 6:55 AM In reply to

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    I Thought of You,While  reading my E Mails this Early Wed Morn.

    I just got an E Mail, New Mexico only requires a High School Education to become a "Substitute Teacher".

    They are always looking for School Bus Drivers. 

    just some thought and prayers for you,Mary

    Gyspy Mary

  • Wed, Oct 21 2009 10:05 AM In reply to

    • MelindaB
    • Top 25 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Fri, May 16 2008
    • Juneau, Alaska USA
    • Posts 1,027

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    As the others have already said, Vent Away... we will pray for you & your child to get through this soon.  Take care of yourselves & do sign up for what you are eligible for, it will help while you are job hunting.

    Dance Like No One Is Watching! ~ Unknown

    Dream as if you'll live forever... Live as if you'll die today! ~ Unknown

    MelindaB

     

    http://s668.photobucket.com/albums/vv42/bugayongfamily/

     

     

     

     

  • Thu, Oct 22 2009 3:16 PM In reply to

    • Pam
    • Top 10 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Thu, Mar 19 2009
    • Beautiful South Carolina
    • Posts 2,108
    • ForumModerator

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Stacey, I'm thinking of you and praying.  I've been in that spot too and I don't at all think you're whining.  Sole support of a small child is a lot of responsibility.  Something will come up, likely better than you've seen before. 

    Pam

    It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. 
      
    Antoine de Saint-Exupery

     

  • Thu, Oct 22 2009 5:35 PM In reply to

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

     Please don't worry about venting too much or often, etc. That is one of the great things about this site. Words cannot express the greatness of the members here! They are the most kind, compassionate and caring that can be found.

    You have gotten great advise here already, but yes hit up all the local offices concerning welfare, health care, assistance for housing/food, etc. That is what it is there for.

    Be sure to call your creditors ( as hard as that may be ) and be honest about your situation. Some may really work with you, some may not. Deal with the ones that you can. Some may reduce interest etc if you call them and simply talk it out.

    Definitely check out the local school systems concerning substitute teaching. Each district has different requirements. Some states require associates or a bachelors, some none. Just have to pass a criminal background check for most I think. Around here, I think some are starting to hire more help gearing up for the holidays. It may not be the best solution, but it maybe something.

    You may not have been looking for answers, but we all want to help. So please, let us know how things are going and if there is anything at all that we can do. Keeping you in my thoughts...

  • Thu, Oct 22 2009 6:09 PM In reply to

    • apachegirl
    • Top 75 Contributor
      Female
    • Joined on Mon, Mar 9 2009
    • Albuquerque, NM
    • Posts 87

    Re: Recently unemployed single mother needs to vent... just a little.

    Quick update: I put a few valuable items of mine up for sale, and I got a bite on one of them -- this will definitely help with the bill due tomorrow, and put some fuel in my car and buy some groceries. I even got a bite on a very expensive silver and blue lapis bracelet made by a late cousin of mine who was a world renowned silver smith. Keep your fingers crossed. I have job applications all over the southwest -- LOL! I will go Monday (go some chores for tomorrow, and I want to go early) to get food stamps -- that will help tremendously. I never thought it would come to this, but going for 41 years before taking public assistance is not bad, I guess. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm too proud to accept assistance -- I just always felt that public assistance should be reserved for those who REALLY need it, as in single mothers with 5 or 6 children, no education or work history, living in a shelter -- that kind of thing. I'm far from that, I have a bachelor's and a fairly impressive work history, so I guess I feel I don't really deserve to be on food stamps when so many are worse off than me. But this economy sucks right now (thanks to our retarded former US president Bush), and I find solace in the thought that I won't be on food stamps forever. I'll just keep pressing on, but sometimes, I want to dash outside where my little one can't see or hear me and cry till I'm dehydrated. I've asked the universe to send a job my way soon with all sincerity and genuine desire in my heart, so now I just have to trust that it will happen for us soon. Coming here helps so much. I guess even writing it down and then knowing that someone is "listening" (reading -- you know what I mean LOL!) helps. Thank you, friends.

     

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